12 best things to say if you're caught sleeping at your desk

12.
"I'm in the management training program. I'm actually doing a Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP) that I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend."

11.
"I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lens without hands."

10.
"They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

9.
"This is just a 15-minute power nap like they raved about in that time-management course you sent me to."

8.
"Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time"

7.
"I wasn't sleeping. I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."

6.
"I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."

5.
"I was doing a highly specific yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminating against people who practice yoga?"

4.
"Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our company's biggest problem."

3.
"The coffee machine is broken..."

2.
"Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."


And the #1 best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk:


1.
"... And, finally, I pray for the future of our company. Amen."



-- from a forward mail