Wednesday, April 30, 2008

The Stories Untold

I might not be blogging like I used to but I am still writing and even if both activities go hand-in-hand, writing is of more importance for me these days. Hence this vacation from blogging. Those of you who loved reading my stories before might like having a look at this blog of mine. It has all the old and new stories and of course, more are coming soon :)


Thursday, April 17, 2008

Blog issues

I am rewriting this post for n-th time now. I thought i would open my story blog for people to read @ And i actually did but then i was forced to close it again by circumstances about which you can read below. I hope you will understand.


I have never considered myself a great, gifted or talented writer. I know people who write much more better than i do. I write because i like it and because i enjoy it. Yes, few friends told me i write well and they like it, and yes, i have won all-russia contest for young writers when i was 17, but it was ages ago, and considering that i write in english which is even not my native language and even not the first and main foreign language i know. My specialization always has been german and it is just happened that english got more priority these days. So considering all the facts and estimating my own stuff i will say i am quite an average person who has writing as her hobby. But even then the acts of plagiarism really annoy and nerve me a lot.

Two of my blogs are licensed under cc lisense and protected by copyscape. It means nobody should dare to steal anything from here because that is the stuff I have written. There are things even in this blog that are not mine - like quotes, lyrics of songs, some articles or stories from forward mails (and the source is usually mentioned in there or at least i said they are not mine) but when someone publishes your stories on the other blog or net-resource it is inappropriate. it is plagiarism and it really can be sued.

I have found my stuff on 3 different websites/blogs without paying any credits or even mentioning in there thats not the work of the blogs' authors. And i dont know if it made me angry or if i should laugh because my work was considered as worth of stealing. But in both cases I dont like it and i dont want it.

Originally i put the links to these sites in here but i was advised to remove them because it is more like promoting these people. So if one of them reads it i again kindly ask you to remove my stuff from your blogs.

I dont mind my stuff being re-published, but please lets respect each other's work and pay credits to the author...


The Way I Am

I don't know it's just the way I am

Nothing in life is permanent. Not the happiness we enjoy, not the depressions we suffer. Every moment is not like any other one and yet they are all very similar. Just like my Eminem-phases. My whole life since i got my first mp3-player many years ago is surrounded by music which reflects my moods, my troubles, my desires, my everything. But even then it can be divided into 2 big parts. Just music (my favourite play list) and my Eminem-phase.

And if you think this phase is a dark one, then you are mistaken. I can not explain it and never could but whenever i have had hard times and tough situations landing up in some gloomy state of mind and depressions, whenever things went wrong and i lost myself and was in constant searches i was always looking forward to these Eminem-phases because they meant i am back on the way to myself, that i am on the right track and things will be better and better day by day.

I dont know from where does it come, but it started like 5-6 years ago when i lived in Germany. Be it homesickness or the fact that Eminem was with concert in the city i lived (i didnt get into though, had to work on that day *sigh*) but it started at those times and since that i have gone through such phases like 3-4 times only. Which is really good, means i didnt lose myself very often in the past few years :)

Yesterday i felt this need for listening to Eminem again which was really a desire one can not confuse for something else. I started looking for my old cds, took me really some time as i have not held them in the hands for at least one year. But it kept me smiling all the way because i knew it only brings me closer to the moment when i become myself again.

One can never understand that Eminem-phase is a light one, and i wouldnt blame anyone for not understanding it because even i myself dont get it how such music full of aggression, sarcasm, rudeness can eventually lead to something good. But it does and i do not give it a second thought because i really dont care about it, i only know that it makes me feel better and i like it.

And i know that is the way i am and i am happy about it. Because life comes back to me with all the colours and sounds. And i am thankful to having such phases in my life that make me believe that I am stronger than i feel, wiser than i seem and braver than i believe. I am Me. And thats the way it should be :)

PPS: check Akki's story below. It is worth it, I promise :)


Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Just Another Story

Today I am proud to introduce one of my favourite bloggers as the guest for Tuesday Love Ramblings. Akki is a very gifted writer though she would never in her life admit it. And even though she couldnt believe i really want her to write something for my blog, i will repeat again and again, it was an honour for me when she agreed!!

She has chosen to write a story and i am proud to announce i have been there on all stages of writing this one, starting from Akki's "Awww... it has been half an hour and i have not written a word yet" and ending with "I got it, here we go!!" And it is my pleasure to introduce to you "Just Another Story" written by my good friend Akki. (Dont forget to check her blogs if you have not yet!!)

"Manu! Remove the clothes from the lines. Its raining!"
She keeps the book away reluctantly and goes to do what her mother has told her to do. She doesn't like anyone bringing her back to reality from her beautiful world of books where each story has a happy ending.
Like every other girl, Manu has believed in her knight in a shining armour and unlike many other girls she has had her knight.

Raghav came her way one evening not very different from this one, when it was about to rain. The lovely smell of the earth getting wet. She was waiting for her friend to show up at the mall, when she saw him parking his car in the basement parking lot. He wasn't that strikingly handsome. But, there was an aura about him. Some indescribable charm that drew her. Those lovely dimples which showed up even without him making an effort to smile. She just stood there ogling him.

She never saw him and barely had the time to think of him later. He was just a fleeting vision or so she thought. The same friend of hers threw her 21st birthday bash. She made a lovely sight in her cream coloured salwar kameez and her waist length hair falling in slight curls. She smiled inwardly, thinking that her own 21st was a silent small affair celebrated at home.

In the far corner of the room, he smiled looking at her smile. He wondered what was it that made her smile like that. Was she thinking of a guy? He hoped not. It would be really bad if she already had someone. There was a weird heaviness as he weighed down that thought. From time to time, his gaze turned towards that vision in cream. He had to do something about it. Well, he was not the kind to believe in love at first sight or the second sight for that matter, but he wanted to take a chance. Something within him propelled him to go talk to her.

"Hi, I am Raghav.", he said. He was shocked to look at her wide-eyed look and wanted to check himself in a mirror if he had suddenly sprouted an extra head.
"Hello", Manu replied. By this time she had gathered her senses and composed that weird look that she must have given him. Those dimples! How could she have forgotten those!
"I am Ashima's brother's friend. We went to the same school.", he said. He wondered why she had given him that odd look in the first place.
"Ashima and I go to the same college now." She told him by way of introducing herself.

That was the first bit of conversation they had. A million were to follow that before they progressively fell in love with each other. In Raghav, Manu found a saviour. Someone she could rely on always. Someone who would take care of her after all these years of loneliness without anyone in her life.
In Manu, (Manasvitha being her full name which he loved) Raghav found a heart with love and care in abundance. Something that he had always searched for and it amazed him that he had found it with such ease.
As time passed by, they grew inseparable. Like every other couple they had a picture-perfect love story on the surface peppered by little fights now and then. It made life seem beautiful.

Like every other love story there was a snag awaiting them too. Born and raised in trite traditional customs both Raghav and Manu found themselves in a quagmire of sorts. Manu's mother who was widowed a couple of years back was against her marrying a boy whom she had not chosen. A devout believer in arranged marriages and her own strong opinions against love compelled her to refuse Manu the right to her happiness.
On the other hand, Raghav's parents were unhappy about the fact that Manu was not one among "them".
Caught between the metaphorical rock and a hard surface, Raghav and Manu only had each other for solace.

This brings us back to Manu's reluctance to leave her world of happy endings as her own ending was a blur of hot arguements with the words love, caste, marriage, refusals sprinkled here and there.
Raghav finds that he is helpless in convincing his parents about Manu and he gives up the fight. He tells Manu that he is leaving her as he is not able to stand the turmoil anymore. Like every other guy he takes an escape route from possible happiness.
Manu tries to get over the love. She wonders how she can ever finish the mammoth task of forgetting him.

Time rolls by. Manu and Raghav live in denial. In denying their feelings for each other. They refuse to marry anyone else their parents choose for them. So engrossed are they in their denial that they don't see time with its hands ticking steadily.

Just when you thought this story was running out of cliches and metaphors and weird twists in the tale, life dishes another one out to them!

At Ashima(ah, the same sweet friend!!)'s wedding both our sweet lovers are thrown together again.
Raghav mentally kicks himself for playing the escape artist.
Manu is embittered with Raghav's deeds.

Some love stories are worth giving a chance. Some, well, despite the ample chances given don't have a dream of growing bigger.
As for this story, there is no ending.
An ending is possible only if someone truly believes in it. Truly believes in their love enough to bear the consequences. Enough to suffer the hardships. Enough to look beyond the wonderful time spent and actually build a future. Enough to convince themselves and even the most stone hearted of hearts that they deserve happiness.

I hope you enjoyed this story as much as i did :)

PS: just a small note, i will catch up with all your posts and comments, i promise. Just have some tough phase right now. Thank you all for having patience with me and reading this blog of mine even though i am not frequent at yours which will change once i find myself again. The previous post is still actual for me, am on the search which sees no end. Anyways, have a great day everyone!! :) :)


Tuesday, April 08, 2008

First Love

Tuesday Love Ramblings have become 4 months old and i believe i have not missed even a single Tuesday during this time. And now it is time to reach a new level and i decided to give word to my blogger friends and let them say what they want to about love. Today i am honoured to welcome Solitaire as my guest blogger with her vision of Tuesday Love Ramblings.


“How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?”

-Albert Einstein

Wow! Albert Einstein was in love too, just like you and me were, are, or will be.

The first glance, the first kiss, your first song dedication, your first dance together, your first meal, those butterflies in your stomach, those warm fuzzy feelings, those anticipatory moments, and the desire to never have it end; remember all that?

We often times complain that relationships can dull and boring after a while. Nothing seems as sweet as the first kiss. Sometimes, we mistake our first kiss ever to be the sweetest and anything and everything after that, seems not so romantic.

Have we lost it all after the first time? I don’t think so!!

Love does not keep count. Love is beautiful. For those in love today, I urge you to write a journal, make a scrap book, make your very own special love-book. Something like Lena’s Tuesday Love Ramblings. The only difference will be that that this will be your Daily Love Ramblings. A special moment, a special picture, a special quote, or just a special kiss, all captured in that book, to hold, and read, and revisit when life seems drab. Very soon, every moment spent with your darling partner will seem special, a moment to remember.

And for those not in love yet, hang in there. It happens to all of us. It happened to Einstein. Why not you? And when you do experience that first kiss, remember our ramblings, and capture it in your very own memorable way!


Here it is to the first Guest Blogger Tuesday Love Ramblings so beautifully done by Solitaire


Sunday, April 06, 2008

Click.... and You're Gone...

One awesome thing about living in 21st century is that with one click of a button you can make a person disappear from your life like they never have been there.

Bothersome photos? no problem... click.. and they're gone.
Click... and all the chats are gone.
Click... and all the pics are in trash.
Click... and the phone number is deleted from the cell.
Click... and the person does not exist in any of social communities.
Click... click... click... and it is all over.

One can almost erase a chapter from one's life by doing this.
But how do you erase memories? I wish we could...


Thursday, April 03, 2008

I want to Give Lena a Gift

I decided too write something more personal rather than some abstract articles about love and relationships and what not. I am quite a mess these days, so sorry if you have not found me on any of your blogs. I commented on few only when i really felt like this but have read almost everyone on my blogroll. Life is kind of hectic these days, trying to sort out some personal stuff along with family responsibilities and work intrigues. Not that pinky coloured but still..

My both nieces are very sick. The small baby is in hospital now with my sister. Flu is extemely late this year. Winter has gone, spring is here with warm sun but flu epidemic captured this city and everyone i know is sick or has been sick or is about to fall sick.

Little Alexandra has fever for 5 days already and no medicine can actually help her. Though today she is already feeling better. This post is completely dedicated to her, the sun of my life, the love of my life, my little Alexandra or as we all call her Sasha :)

She will be 5 in summer and even though she was born premature nobody would say this now, she looks like she is a school kid at least 7 years old.

People say kids all are cute and beautiful. Well... they are, but everyone knows that their child is the most...
most beautiful
most intelligent
the best :)

And it is true, for their family they are :)

Some words of "wisdom" /my daily dose/ from my little angel.

We should find someone for Lena. It is not fair. Mom has Dad, Grandma has Grandpa. Lena has no one, we should find someone for her. Ended up with me getting some teddy to sleep with :D

Watching TV. There was Putin's press-conference.
Me: Look, you know who is this man?
She: No
Me: This is Mr. Putin, our president. Got it?

She: yes

Me: Who is this man?

She: I dont know

Me: Sweetie, this is our president, Mr. Putin

She: okay

My mom: He is the main person in the country

She: (after long pause, surprised) But you said i am the main person in the country??

Me: Well, he is too..

She: okay, i will be the main girl and he will the main man, is it okay?
Me: Sure, honey

Me: I dont want to go to office today
She: you have to

Me: why?

She: you have to earn money

Me: what for?

She: for buying me a pony, you dumbo!
(Hasbro Pony is her current dream)

She: Grandma, i want to give Lena a gift
Me: no, dear, its okay, i dont need it

She: Grandma, give me a broken toy that i dont use anymore, i want to give it to Lena


She: (after getting an injection) you, scoundrels....
i wonder from where she got the word?

My mom after i came home from office: there are pancakes in the kitchen. Get some before it is too late.
Me going to the kitchen, no pancakes.

Alexandra: it is already too late, i gave them to the dog.

Me: **speechless** (thinking - "good for figure")

She(when she was 3): It is my computer.
Me: sweetie, it is mine!

She: then where is mine?

Me: you dont have one yet

She is crying

Me: we will buy you a computer.

My mom to me: you can buy yourself a new one and she will get this old (which was quite new by that time btw)

Alexandra: you dont dare to give me an old computer. I need only a new one!

Now she has a new one..

These are the ones that came to my mind now, maybe will come up with more later :)

PS: those who subcribed to the story blog you are very much welcome to read and give some feedback on it!


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